Uninspired

Uninspired

No spark, ideas scorn the thought

To light untrammeled planes within the mind

No fleeting inspiration to be caught

No proud work signed

With joyous pen; frustration reigns, unkind

Blank paper stares unblinking, void of words

Whilst to the Fates my plume has been resigned

But hark!  A thunder in the sky, a gathering herd

And swift bright thoughts  rush in --

Sweet shining birds.
~Monica

I've been stuck... for months.  I tend to be a creative fury kind of artist.  Pounding out the pieces, the ideas coming so quickly, my hands can't keep up with my mind can't keep up with my heart.  I tell myself to slow down, to be logical, to meditate.  But there's nothing logical when you're playing with fire.    And then... it comes.  This wall of emptiness surrounding me like a sleeping bag, pulling me inside and zipping me up tight.  My heartbeat slows down.  Thank God for the rest. 
Then I sit in that darkness and wait...
and wait...
and wait some more.

The questions start to come. 
Will it ever come back? 
Maybe I was crazy and it never was there to begin with.
Maybe I have no more worthy ideas.
Maybe I don't need to torture myself anymore pretending to be something I'm not.
Then the pressure starts.
People begin to ask.
When are you going to pick up those brushes?
Some even make demands.
I stay in my bag, zipped up tight.
Until suddenly I become curious.
I unzip a corner.
Light peaks through, warming me
zip
by zip
by zip.

And outside the bag are all my beautiful colors..

They never left me at all.
They were the vessel for my emptiness...

not the other way around.

This creativity bowl was originally a thrift store find.  An unfinished, handmade wooden bowl, I was most perplexed as to how I could use the little whole on the bottom where the carver must have had it attached to a stand.  And I certainly wanted to do this little gem justice!  So when that dark, gloomy creative block comes, I can have the bowl right side up, remembering that my creativity has created this void in order to replenish and refill.  And as those ideas fly out of me, I can turn the bowl over to see what will grow.

Love Memories

Going back to the past of unhealthy former relationships... it's a tedious task.  The divorce, the separation, the breaking up is in and of itself difficult  to relive.  But once we have come back into balance, found ourselves again,  a haunting question sometimes lingers.. more sensitive than any rembrance of pain that may have been inflicted upon us.  That question is.. why did I fall in love with you?  What was it in me that needed you?  Why did I allow myself to be treated this way?  Why did I participate in this abusive concoction?   Why did I permit my spirit to be stifled?  Why did I feel so unworthy of something greater?  What took me so long to walk?

There are no easy answers.  It's a muddle of childhood experiences, personality traits, being in the wrong place at the wrong time, knowing some things but not others, and unlucky chemistry.  This isn't about faults or inadequacies and, God forbid, stupidity.  It's about learning to not see yourself as a victim in order to be a survivor.  And, unfortunately, there's more to that than substituting words.



Thank you to Frostfire, from our Friends in Healing community, for sharing this video in which he plays the backup cello.  This song was written and performed by Jim Salinger from Los Angeles, CA.  The painting is my original artwork. And thank you to a special friend, who shared their story to me this week.

Healing Art Challenge: Harvest

When we plant in the soil of contemplation, we can reap in the harvest of action.

~ Meister Eickhart

Sacred Arts Studio and the Friends in Healing Community is excited to announce a new weekly art challenge to be posted each Friday.  This challenge is open to artists, poets, photographers, writers, and musicians.  This week's challenge is the theme HARVEST.    Harvest is the act of gathering a crop.  What are you harvesting in your own life?  How do you harvest?  There are wonderful quotes about harvest to choose from if you would like to add words to your image.  You might want to include a short meditation with your pieces.  Please email all challenges to friendsinhealing@gmail.com by Thursday, November 18 at 12 pm CST time. If your entry is a longer written piece or requires a music player, please include a link.  All entries will be posted a week from today.  May your creative fire be lit!

Simple Lessons

After a week of such intense work building our new Friends in Healing Community,   several members in our chatroom were discussing how much we complicate our lives, making big things out of small things, and forgetting those simple life values that are as relevant as adults as when we were children.  Come, think with me.  What was a life lesson you learned as a child that is important for you to remember as an adult?
Click comments to leave a response!

Blaze

My house just burnt down.
I now own a better view
Of the rising moon.
~Monica


Sometimes change happens slowly and methodically, with careful deliberation. And other times, someone pulls our band aid off quickly.

It has been a difficult few months for me artistically.. as a person who suffers from chronic depression and anxiety, there are times I must pull into hibernation. I am happy to report that, while I'm still being challenged with the daily struggles of living with this disease.. recent changes in my life have forced me into a new venture that I am so delighted to share with you.

In the right column of this page, I and a group of very faithful friends are creating an online chat support community, available 24 hours a day to people all across the world. We are working with names for this community.. right now using "Friends in Healing" as we believe all people, at any given time in their lives have difficulties they are facing, challenges to find strategies for, and experiences requiring good self-care and support. So for those of you experienceing a transition in life, feelings of grief, solitude, or any other challenge, please join us below and become our friend.

Today I invite you to share in the comments section stories of moments in your life when you experienced a "blaze" and what new views you were able to own. Many many thanks to one of our chatters for providing this lovely haiku.